Last night was better

Bed time was better last night. The boys ate at their normal time. But instead of bath immediately they both played independently and I was able to fold clothes. It was a little bit of a relaxing night. Around 6:15 we headed to the bath. I stayed with Sam for 20 minutes or more making sure he was calm and ready for bed before I left. That worked. He did not get out of bed and went straight to sleep.

I think it was a successful night!!

Day to Day

I am in a little bit of a funk. Both boys are growing and our routines are changing. I am not sure how to change though. Andrew is becoming a kid and I don't know how to make sure he is still a little boy but yet give him kid privileges (not even sure privileges is the right word). Sam is growing too. His bed time routine is so off right now. I hate it. He used to be so easy to put to bed. Now he gets out, cries, bangs the door. All these things I thought he would do when he first got his big boy bed. I still think he needs a "lovie" b/c he likes to snuggle. Elphie isn't making the cut. But what that item or thing is a mystery to me. I am reading him more books trying to get him to a calm peaceful state before leaving. He doesn't want anything. You can't negotiate or reason with him. It is a little tiring. Then to top it off he is waking up at 5:45 am by screaming my name. He used to be the one we would have to wake up. Where did my good sleeping child go? Naps are even a nightmare. They used to be easy. I blame beck leaving. We weren't ready for that. I wasn't ready for that. But it happened and no going back now.

Meal times are becoming more difficult too. I know I feed them the same three things and hardly give them vegetables. But they don't eat them when I try. They always eat fruit though. They aren't finishing their dinners either. So I wonder if they need to eat later. Give them a snack when we get home and then dinner. I don't know. We have had the best routine for 4 years. I thrived off our old ways and now I am in complete darkness. I don't know what to do. I want to change and grow too but I don't know how.

The organizations I am involved in are busy now too. So not only do I have the mom stress of keeping life organized and happy at home, I have extra curricular stress too. I know I put that on myself but lately it has seemed like nothing is really coming together. I am bouncing around instead of being still. I want to be still for a minute. But then when I do have a still minute - I am confused and anxious.

Basically, I am in a mom funk. I am hoping that the tide turns and I am back to feeling confident. But right now, I don't.

Here are some pictures of the boys this week.

Andrew is the best big brother

The other day I was thinking about Sam and Andrew. Sam is funny. He is a hand full. He has an energy for life. Then I thought about Andrew and what an amazing big brother he is. Andrew is sweet and sensitive. He loves our little family and never wants anyone left out. He also has energy for life. He loves all things stuffed (animals that is). He has a kind heart. God gave us the perfect first child. I am in awe of Andrew He is so smart! So very smart and he seems to love learning. Andrew has become more attached to Ralphie. He is constantly loving on Ralphie. Andrew calls Ralphie "boy" as in "come here boy". That is so funny to us because we have never called an animal boy.

While it was on my mind I wanted to write that Andrew is the best big brother. Seeing that and knowing that is a wish and prayer come true.

3rd Crown isn't going to work

Sam lost the right crown again last night. He is going to have that tooth pulled on Tuesday. I did find the tooth in his bed. I am really upset about it. I know in the long run it is not a big deal because he will get his permanent tooth. But my heart is hurting. He looks so different with a missing tooth. I am really sad.

Cute pictures from the weekend

The boys had two birthday parties this weekend. One was a PJ and Doughnut party. Andrew and Sam are just too cute in these pictures.

Dr. Seuss Week

The other week M&M Learning Factory had Dr. Seuss week. The boys dressed up a little each day. They had silly sock day, silly hair day, wear red day, inside out day and dress up as your favorite Dr. Seuss character.

Meet Elphie

As I have mentioned, Beck had to go "bye-bye". I decided to go with the approach of out with the old and in with the new. Beck probably meant as much to me as Sam. I loved that he had. I loved it calmed him down (b/c he gets feisty easily). I loved that it helped soothe him while he went to sleep for naps and bedtime. I loved that when he woke up too early, he would have his Beck to soothe back to a calm and restful state. So I was very nervous about putting Beck up. Sam of course has done amazingly well. So proud of him. He understood that Beck had to go "bye-bye" because of his teeth. We went to Toys R Us for Sam to pick out a new night time lovey. He picked out every animal on the shelf. Then he settled on a British Geoff the Giraffe (but an elephant was close second). I thought that was hilarious. We paid for the Giraffe and got to the car. Then Sam had a melt down. He wanted the elephant. I was not about to have this a bad experience. We got out of the car and returned the Giraffe for Elphie the elephant.

Elphie is not Beck. He does not do the job that Beck did. But Sam does like Elphie and he talks to it and he loves on it. It was an emotional day but I think it was positive.

Sam called out for Beck for a week at random times during the night, but now there is no mention of it. Recently Andrew asked about where it was and Sam said "Beck bye'bye" without a care in the world. I guess it was time to get rid of it. He is two.